MestizaLens

The most joyous and the saddest Fourth of July in 27 years. At the same time. Life’s paradoxes and mysteries. In God we trust; by the grace of God we all go—so more than ever. 🙏

Mother’s Day.
This day can be joyful, painful, or complicated—
especially for those of us who have lost our mothers or grandmothers,
or who never became mothers ourselves.

I’ve lost both of my grandmothers.
I’ve lost my mother.
I never became a biological or stepmother.

20 years ago, I had an ectopic pregnancy.
18 years ago, I tried IVF.
The embryos didn’t take.
Those were my only chances for biological children.

And yet—Mother’s Day doesn’t make me sad.

Why?
Because I’ve learned to live by a simple truth:
I focus on what I do have, not what I don’t.
That’s how I choose to go about life.

So today, I celebrate.
I honor the losses and rejoice in the blessings.

I celebrate the mother who loved me deeply
and sacrificed greatly.

I celebrate the father she chose for me—
a man who raised me and still loves me without condition.

I celebrate generations of strong, generous, purposeful women
who nurtured not just families, but whole communities.

I celebrate that I am a woman—
and that womanhood is not defined by motherhood alone.

I have birthed visions, projects, organizations, and opportunities.
I have mentored, led, created, and cared.
That, too, is a kind of motherhood.

Today, I honor ALL women:

Bio moms. Bonus moms.
Those who longed for children.
Those who chose another path.
Those who’ve endured loss.
Those who’ve embraced freedom.

Because being a woman—
through joy, pain, birth, loss—
is to be life itself.

And that is worth celebrating.
Happy Mother’s Day!

The photo shows my mother and grandmother, circa 1960.