Equine Blooming

I am not a body with a soul, I am a soul who happens to have this body.

When push comes to shove I will always make my decisions in that order.

Soul first.

Then body.

I had a dream last night. I had a dream that I picked you up, & we went for strawberry ice cream together 🍓

It was a beautiful dream, & I haven’t been able to shake it all day.

I’ve lost two friends in my life in violent ways, two friends whose deaths I found out about via social media posts.

That’s not something I would wish on anyone, ever.

I worry about most of the people in my life, but some more than others. The ones I can’t see in person. The ones I can’t touch, I can’t hold. & especially the ones I know are vulnerable.

But of all my friends I think I worry about you the most. The grief of not being able to verify if you’re ok, if you’re still fighting- it’s a monster in my heart.

But the joy you have brought me, the comfort, laughs, & inside jokes- I will gladly host this monster to have known your friendship.

As I’ve grown I’ve realized that most relationships {all?} are impermanent in some way. They change, evolve, end. Sometimes for the better, sometimes not. & while my heart wants to rail against this; hold you all as close to me as I can forevermore, I can not. So instead I say this-

I love you, I will always love you. Wherever you are, whatever you are doing- I love you 🤍 🍃