Filigree & Shadow

I had composed one of my better posts (if I do say so myself) ready to kickoff involving computer software, technology, and the adult entertainment industry. It even included a millionaire whomst ruined what could have been an otherwise okay hookup had he not grimaced after audibly farting – this story had it ALL – but even p**n is awash in AI hoping to fight another day for relevancy, so instead I will herald the month of June with a simple prayer:

Be gay, do crimes.

Thank you once again, , for your beautiful work.

To paraphrase Edvard Munch, flowers will bloom and she is in them, and that is eternity.

Thank you, everyone, who took a few minutes of your time to commemorate our sweet Jóna.

In a world where events are constantly vying for our attention, you stopping what you were doing to read about how much we love her is everything.

I was dismayed, and a little surprised, that a company went out of its way to find my email and offered a collaboration on social media posts to promote cat scratchers.

Meta for Business sent me two emails inviting me to join its monetizing program to “reach your full potential.”

In such a short amount of time, we’ve built these fantastic systems where we can collectively share in each other’s lives whilst capitalism pushes us to swallow galaxies whole in our collective appetite.

When my mom died from Covid, the fragrance I made in her memory was how I processed everything who she was to me. My therapist pushed me to release the fragrance, and it meant the world that so many people understood what I made.

I don’t have any materials to sketch a fragrance for Jóna, so I typed out a post for her to let the world know she existed.

Jóna is an opalescent star in our galaxy. And for a moment, we were blessed to know her brilliance.

The fact that you all – friends, family, colleagues, customers, and random passersby – collectively grieved with us and celebrated Jóna’s life means so very much. 🩶

Years and years ago I read an article in “The Economist” – would it kill Meta to introduce italics and bold in text? – where someone argued a better version of capitalism could flourish as every boat is lifted. I really took that ideology to heart and centered my business around community, not competition. When you came to visit my studio in West Seattle, I didn’t just share my fragrances with you: I introduced hundreds of customers to perfumers whose fragrances are now in their collections. A basic premise of community allowed all of us independent and artisan perfumers to prosper.

That is, at its core, the mission and vision of .nl. A retail boutique in Amsterdam featuring curated perfumes both independent and author-led. My approach will be the same as it was in West Seattle: regardless of your background, identity, or prior knowledge of perfume, there will be something here for you.

My business is now officially registered in the Netherlands, so I’ll be hitting the pavement every day in De Pijp and Jordaan until I can successfully find a retail location that has a decent amount of room, foot traffic, and doesn't break the bank. (My 43-page business plan already accounted for rent in the financial plan.)

Relaunching Filigree & Shadow in the E.U. is phase two. I have to start from scratch – materials, compliance, everything – and that timeline won't jive with a government expecting me to contribute to society and pay taxes. So I’ll begin with a smaller, fully compliant selection—formulas I can responsibly produce with materials I can actually source. From there: discovery sets, travel sizes, and larger volumes for those who’ve been asking.

Until then, I’m here to build something that lifts boats. I’m not just a mom. I’m also a canal.

We picked up our boxes from our friends who live outside Bruges (Brugge) last Wednesday. We rented a 15m sprinter and drove from Amsterdam to our friends’ house. We stayed long enough for hello kisses, packing the sprinter, eating a sumptuous lunch, goodbye hugs, waiting in traffic for four hours to return home, then returning the sprinter in their 24-hour lot because I am not about to pay for hourly parking in the city only to return it the next morning.

European drivers have no concept of the physics, the way they overtake lorries (trucks) then merge into the lane with not even a meter of space. You all need to understand that if you hit the brakes on your car, at that distance, the lorry will be braking through you. But I digress.

All of our belongings survived the journey from the New World to the Old World intact. Double-corrugated cardboard boxes and compostable packing peanuts FTW. We discovered that Justin has more shoes and pants than we previously thought, and I do not need another item of clothing again. Ever.

To know me you must understand I was raised on a steady diet of reading “Bloom County” as a child. Some people might say “Calvin and Hobbes” is the greatest comic of all time (GOAT), but that’s a lie. It’s “Bloom County.” Next to both versions of Opus the Penguin plushie is a world history book given to me by my maternal grandmother. This book and a colored photograph of her sleeping on a porch are all I have that were hers. In case you were wondering, the history of the world opens with The Creation and ends with the history of Paraguay in 1874. Nothing else has occurred since.

We are awaiting our residence permits so we can get local phone numbers. We can purchase health insurance – €347 per month total, compared to $1450 per month in the U.S. – and I will be able to set up a business in Amsterdam.

If I were a penguin, such as Opus, I, too, would have a wish for wings that work. So I hit the ground running. (In new shoes.)

We arrived safely with all four cats in Amsterdam. They have taken a shine to the bed as we currently have no other furniture in the apartment. Every day we are adding something to the apartment: yesterday we outfitted our kitchen with cookware, and today we’ll be buying furniture for the living room. The cats would appreciate having something else to lounge upon.

We have appointments next week with Immigration for our residence permits and biometrics. Once we each receive our BSN, we’ll be able to open Dutch bank accounts, finalize our utilities, and get Internet access at home.

We’ve given ourselves the month of March to set ourselves up in our new home, and the city has been nothing but wonderful to explore by foot and public transport. Soon we’ll add bikes to our modes for transportation.

A lot of the anxiety I’ve been holding onto has finally given way. I cannot wait to begin what comes next. Until then, I’ll continue learning Dutch and subject locals to my butchering of their vowels.