Odat One Day At A Time

Day 2:
Let me tell you about Day #1
The hardest moment I experienced yesterday was finding the time to make it outside to do the 45 Minute workout after spending the day learning Self Defense.

I came to a moment where I told my Mom, ”I have done everything except for this workout and reading the 10 pages of a book. (Which I left in my office)

I thought to myself, I am not going to FAIL ON THE FIRST DAY!
I went to the square at 8:30 pm to walk around downtown for 45 minutes.
I sat at the concert with my mom, reading the 10 pages of 75HARD, I was not going to fail one the first day!
I MADE IT, I PUSHED MYSELF, I DID THE HARD ISH! BECAUSE I AM CAPABLE OF IT!

When I said I was going to go ALL IN, I meant it!.
I cannot promise that I will not fail during these 75 days, but I know that day was not yesterday! And it won’t be today!

Letting Go of Struggles

“Edge up against your pain and give it a name”

—Patricia Benson

Dwelling on our pain is unproductive and can heighten our anxieties. However, we do need to identify the pain, give it attention, and then be willing to let it go. Naming it sheds light on it, preventing the pain from living in the shadows where it remains free to haunt us.

Life is never wholly free from struggle and pain. As part of the human community, we learn significant lessons, and our willingness to experience the journey may sometimes appear directly related to the amount of pain we have suffered. But letting our steps be guided by our Higher Power, instead of fearfully resisting that Power, will make our lessons easier to learn and our journey smoother.

When the pain-filled moments come, as they may today, we can remember to acknowledge them and give them over to the One who has all power.

Today I will recognize my pain if it comes, and I will take responsibility for my part in it. It will leave when I do my part and let my Higher Power do the rest

It must be easy to be a Positive person, despite adversity.

It is not easy for any of us to transcend the past or the pain we have suffered by the decisions of others. … Decisions that were written into our Life story.

We do not have the option to write our childhoods… they are written by others who we are given to protect us.
At times we have suffered.
Yet, there are gifts in the pain, we can choose to let the light into the dark spaces in life.
We can choose to accept the fact that we are not alone.

But sometimes that pain and suffering turned into self destruction, addictions and self hatred.
I spent many years being angry at Men, at Myself, I projected my disgust of how men act onto everyone that I encountered… I hated myself for what had happened to me. I was victimizing myself.
I have spent many years healing the inner child, loving the woman i see looking back at me in the mirror.

One thing that I have asked of men in my life today is to honor my body… Be sexual with me when we mutually agree. Speak Respectfully to me, spend sincere intimate time with me and listen to my fears… Let go of yourself enough to accept that I am not perfect and sometimes I am closed to your affection and unable to let the barriers down.
Be patient with me…. Treasure me…
I am precious and deserving of love, but please understand that I will always choose myself over pleasing others.
Because I am the only one who can love me in a perfect way…