Barbara Feil Counseling

Today I pray for all those for whom gratitude seems very hard to find...who live with persistent loneliness, pain, and trauma that is not seen by those around them. May they find hope in the cross that was essential before resurrection or as Francis Weller describes in "The Wild Edge of Sorrow" - "Through our ability to acknowledge the layers of loss, we can truly discover our capacity to respond, to protect and to restore what has been damaged." Thankful for this reality...

I like to point to the example of Jesus when it comes to our emotions.

We see Him weep.
We see Him get angry.
We see Him grieve.

The goal isn't to numb ourselves so that we're never showing any emotion. Nor is the goal to let our emotions run roughshod over our lives (and over everyone around us.)

The goal is to be in a healthy relationship with our emotions. To honor them. To let them flow through. To let them make us more human.

Learning to honor the cues your emotions are sending you is part of the work of trusting yourself. I write about this process in my new book The Best of You, available anywhere books are sold today!

This is a very important organization identified as having a Godly Response to Abuse in Christian Environments. They provide legal counsel and support victims and educate the church and Christian organizations about how to respond to abuse within their walls and to victims of abuse in their church. As I work with those who have often been hurt by the very people God sent to heal I deeply appreciate them.

Churches should be a safe place to express pain, doubts, discomfort, lament, and struggle. This is critical for churches to be safe for survivors.

I know I have not posted much during the past 15 months, but I have had a front row seat to how difficult the pandemic/quarantine /fires/politics/election/racial unrest has been especially on those who already carry past trauma. The next time you see someone over-react be compassionate. Maybe it's not just the present that is being responded to!

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