Bitterness is My Name

As the fur on his muzzle greys, it reminds me time is passing by. That he won't be here forever and it's counting down. I fight off the mental neurosis and panic that brings as when I cut past everything, he really is my reason to live most days. To persist. To do my best (seemingly failing), to participate in capitalism and money, to provide the best I can for his needs because he deserves that and more that I can't give.
Alas, when his time has come to an end on this earth, I think any feeling of purpose, will leave with him.
I've seen mountains, rivers, oceans, deserts, waterfalls, moors, wetlands, bogs.
I've seen most if not all the landscapes of this incredible planet. I've been in love, been in pain, felt ecstasy, hurt others, drowned from the darkness in my own mind and the reality of my species.
I already know, the wound will be too great, and I will not be able to cope.
So, I shall leave too, after he has the best send off I can offer.
It will be my last lonely effort.

The narcissistic assailant
Dropping four letter bombs
They exploded now and not even hot air was found inside.
Swollen with meaningless and absolutely empty.
A foul manipulation played in your favor
Against a deeply wounded heart
Who's gut instinct was right all along.

The Breath of Fire

I know you mean to breathe combusting energy- producing cleansing fire into me oh wisest of the dark horses.
Goetic dark demon horse the wisest of hoofed generals
I met you in a dream where you stood with me in the place I was deeply wounded physically and psychologically
And you, with a deep velvety black empathy tell me I am not defined of it and to rise with fire in my chest
I know you mean to breathe the fire of creation and life but I feel this burnt out tree body of mine can only hold embers and smoke...
I saw you again in the garden of my year's intention and you with your eyes of flame and dragons mouth breathed fire into me when greeting breath
I hope I can honor you and not just smoulder and smoke...