The Intuitive Momma

Oh man oh man! This guy is 4 months old today on this first “Friday the 13th” of the year with only one more in December till June 2025.

And the sunshine you radiate reminds me of how much control we have in how we feel, what we do and in who we choose to be.

I love listening to you laugh at Clay while he does yoga, I am appreciative for any and all happy dinosaur noises you make- even the ones at 5am and I am so appreciative for the breastfeeding journey we’ve been on together. Almost exclusively breastfeeding you has been such a blessing, daily moments of rest and peace with just you and also held me accountable to my self healing by nurturing and sustaining you.

10/10 would recommend having another baby.

Finn James, you continue to bring joy, love and laughter into our lives baby brother and we all cherish you so much.

Your body goes through so much in the transition of preparing itself to carry and care for a new life.

And damn- we are hard on ourselves- internally, externally, socially, etc etc etc etc

But to have a few daily practices that can be gentle enough to not disturb the process of creating life but also support and comfort you along the way- those are what my soul desperately needed this time.

This time was a lot different than my other two pregnancies. This time has challenged my mental capacity constantly by not allowing me to over do or over exert much of anything.

This time tapped into my skewed belief that what I could “do”, achieve, accomplish, complete etc etc- was in direct relation to my worth, my value and ultimately a lot of what made up my identity.

This time has been about “unbecoming.”

I fought it a lot, for months straight, and still consider it from time to time.

It humbled me and made me extremely grateful for my “normal, every day” health.

And in these final 12 weeks of carrying this baby- I finally figured out what real balance feels like, what it feels like to not be in balance and how deeply my soul needed me to just be okay with releasing control, not feel inclined to “do” in exchange for love and support.

That I am worthy of being loved and cared for, simply because I exist.

My husband has also been an extremely safe, unconditional space for me to land as I continued to challenge these lessons by a little game called “f**k around and find out” during this pregnancy and for that I am so grateful.
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