Sara Robinson Coaching

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I work with the Feral ones.

Deception in a relationship is often rooted in fear.

He told me to share our mistakes, so here goes.

When I started dating my partner, He was also seeing another woman. We all know that's not a deal breaker for me. All I asked was, "Please tell me when You spend time with her." That's all I wanted.

Fast forward a few months and the development of a ridiculous connection that's led us to temporarily close our relationship with some caveats that fully allow us to express our truth.

One of these caveats is that He can form friendships with women freely. He's shown me no reason to be suspicious of this and makes me a priority while including me in many interactions most wouldn't. I am a part of His process.

And then the mistake.

Remember that woman I told you about?

Well, unbeknownst to me, they are still friends and still hang out.

The best part? I wouldn't have cared! No part of me would've given two f*cks. I trust him to not cross the "closed" boundaries of our relationship. He is allowed to have female friends and has shown me over and over that he's capable of doing it the way we agreed.

Oopsies!! He f*cked up. He broke several simple boundaries we agreed to. There was some other s**t, but this was the one that tipped me over the edge.

Guys. When I tell you every, single deception trigger I had roared... I had all kinds of s**t come up and through me. Every serious partner I've ever had deceived me around women. Everyone one of them lied. I'd not had to deal with this one yet, so f*ck me holy s**t.

💜 I could've said "F*ck this. I'm out," and part of me wanted to.

💜 I could've shamed Him and laid into Him like only a woman can.

💜 I could've decided to not say anything to Him and stew until I exploded.

Instead, I chose to pause, process, emotion dump, and speak to a very trusted family member to help me work through it. I used every MF'ing skill I posses to get to the bottom of why I was soooooo pi**ed.

Then I cried.

I cried hard. I sobbed. I allowed everything to come up and out.

And I talked with him. I called him on it in a way he could hear. I told him this deception, this not telling me something because he was afraid of my reactions, could never, ever happen again. I told him I know this is how "normal" relationships function, but that we are better and stronger than "normal." I expect a brave partner. (I didn't assume he was scared. He told me. - important fact)

And he responded exactly how I needed. He fully owned it. He expressed full remorse. He committed to never doing it again. He appologized profusely. He was a healthy human about it.

And here we are today. We are stronger for it. We understand each other more fully. We are conquering our fears together.

I wouldn't do this for just anyone. He has shown me respect like no other person ever has. He is capable of this. He is wise, and he is learning to be vulnerable.

Before you run, jump to conclusions or react in a way that will only hurt your connections, pause, process, emotion dump. Use every mf'ing skill you have. Cry! Develop new skills through the process. Use this as an opportunity to improve your connection vs destroy it.

We all mess up. We all hurt the ones we love.

The trick is the repair.

If you're ready to learn to work through the divides in your relationships or do your own development so they don't happen as often, reach out to me. The more you deal with your own s**t, the easier this is. The self-awareness is key, My Friends. And that is what I'm a genius at helping people with.

I'm accepting 2 more 1:1 clients and/or couples+ this month. Reach out to ask questions. I'm here to help.

Much Love to you. Thank you for reading my novel. 😘