Jennifer Melling, DVM

I feel this 💯

Parenting has changed the way I practice veterinary medicine, and honestly, it has changed me too.

Before becoming a parent, I spent years in a version of vet med that often rewarded overwork, constant availability, and blurred boundaries. Long ICU shifts, late nights, answering messages at all hours…I thought that was just part of being a dedicated veterinarian.

But becoming a single mom by choice in 2020 forced me to ask some hard questions about what I wanted my life to look like and what truly mattered most to me.

For the first time in my career, I had non-negotiable boundaries. Daycare pickup times. School routines. Bedtime. I couldn’t stay late indefinitely or always squeeze in “just one more thing.” And while that adjustment was not always easy, it taught me something incredibly important:

Boundaries do not make us less compassionate, less committed, or less capable. In many ways, they allow us to show up more fully for the people and patients we care about.

I still experience guilt sometimes. There are moments when I’m deeply immersed in work and feel guilty for not being home. And moments when I’m fully present with my daughter and feel guilty for not doing more professionally. But over time, I’ve stopped seeing these roles as competing with each other.

I’m not either a veterinarian or a parent. I’m both.

And I know so many others in veterinary medicine are navigating similar challenges. Trying to build meaningful careers while also protecting time for family, relationships, health, and themselves.

This Friday, I’ll be speaking with Scribenote during a panel discussion about parenting and balance in veterinary medicine, and I’m really looking forward to having an honest conversation about the realities, challenges, and lessons that come with trying to hold both roles at once.

I also recently wrote a deeply personal blog on this topic: “Boundaries, Balance, and Being Both a Parent and a Veterinarian.”

🖇️ Blog link: https://marieholowaychuk.com/2026/04/15/boundaries-balance-and-being-both-a-parent-and-a-veterinarian/

🖇️ Event link: https://calendly.com/allison-scribenote/scribenote-webinar-motherhood-in-vetmed

To the veterinary professionals who are trying to care deeply for both their work and their families: I see you. And I think these conversations matter.

Another great reason to not smoke.

Cats are uniquely vulnerable due to their grooming behavior. To***co smoke particles accumulate on their fur and are subsequently ingested, resulting in repeated oral and systemic exposure over time.

Higher risk has been observed in cats living in smoking households, particularly those exposed for five or more years or in homes with multiple smokers, compared to cats in non-smoking environments. Cats whose owners smoked 1–19 ci******es per day demonstrated a significant fourfold increase in the risk of oral squamous cell carcinoma.

The risk is not limited to oral tumors. Cats exposed to household to***co smoke have a 2.4-fold increased risk of malignant lymphoma (95% confidence interval: 1.2–4.5), rising to 3.2-fold after five or more years of exposure (95% confidence interval: 1.5–6.9). Notably, risk increases in a dose- and duration-dependent manner.

Beyond carcinogenesis, to***co smoke exposure disrupts the balance between oxidants and antioxidants in cats. Significant increases have been reported in total oxidant levels, oxidative stress index, lipid hydroperoxides, protein carbonyls, and advanced oxidative protein products, alongside decreased total antioxidant capacity and reduced antioxidant enzyme activity.

In parallel, exposed cats exhibit elevated pro-inflammatory signaling molecules, including interferon gamma, interleukin-1 beta, interleukin-2, and interleukin-6, indicating activation of systemic inflammatory pathways.

Bertone ER, Snyder LA, Moore AS. 2003. Environmental and lifestyle risk factors for oral SCC in cats. J Vet Intern Med.
Bertone ER, Snyder LA, Moore AS. 2002. Environmental to***co smoke and lymphoma risk in cats. Am J Epidemiol.
Köseoğlu E, Yıldırım F, et al. 2023. To***co smoke induces oxidative stress in cats. Vet Res Forum.

I will also add dental problems. Chronic tennis ball use is like sand paper for the teeth leading to the need for tooth extraction. 🦷

THE PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL COSTS OF FETCH

Dogs often exhibit a strong affinity for chasing balls due to the activation of their predatory motor pattern, which stimulates internal rewards associated with dopamine and serotonin release. In their natural environment, wild or free-roaming dogs typically hunt in short, intense bursts followed by periods of calm consumption and rest. It is rare to observe these animals engaging in prolonged, frantic running while hunting, as this behaviour can induce stress and frustration.

However, in a domestic setting, guardians frequently engage their dogs in repetitive ball-throwing and fetch activities despite the potential physical and psychological strain on the animal.

Prolonged engagement in such activities, particularly with the use of launching devices, can lead to significant joint degeneration, arthritis, and ligament injuries due to high-impact movements. Furthermore, it can result in dopamine-driven addiction, manifesting as obsessive behaviors, heightened arousal, poor impulse control, and difficulties in calming down. In dogs already prone to high arousal levels, this could potentially lead to manic behaviour.

Therefore, achieving balance is crucial; limiting fetch exercises to brief daily sessions or incorporating low-arousal, mentally stimulating activities between fetch sessions is advisable.

I'm not advocating for the stopping of playing fetch, especially if it brings your dog joy while providing quality time and bonding opportunities with you. It's more about achieving a balance between high arousal games and low arousal mental stimulation activities, while reducing the probability of physical damage to their bodies as they age.