Wishful Thinking Works

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“The Art of Unfolding”

“I’m a book lover and a budding unfolder. My definition of an unfolder, is a person, who lets life unfold at its own pace and in its own way.

Unfolding is an art, not a science. It takes practice and patience – two things I used to avoid in life. You see, there once was a time if I could not do something well after the first couple of tries, I simply crossed it off my list. Yes, you are right; that was a silly thing to do. And, I must admit there was also a time when “having it yesterday” was not soon enough for me.

Fortunately for me, and those around me, I have learned the benefits of trusting myself and my instincts and embracing the art of unfolding.

Unfolding is similar to being in a library walking through rows and rows of books. My feelings of excitement and anticipation grow, as I realize all the options presented before me ~ so many books, so little time!

I peruse the shelves, looking high and low, stretching and bending to read the titles. Then slowly and with intention I raise my hand, and use the tip of my index finger to gently tilt the chosen spine toward me, and the book of choice slides from the shelf.

An option has become an opportunity, and a bit of my fate now rests in my hands.

It’s just a book, you say. Perhaps, but like any moment in life, it might hold much more. It may spark my imagination, expand my experience, increase my knowledge, or perhaps become part of my life in a way i never considered.

I read the cover, and if it captures my attention I flip it open and check the table of contents or move directly to the opening paragraph, letting the story unfold before my eyes.

Ahh, the priceless art of unfolding.

To become an unfolder, please:

1. Show-up

~ Nothing happens without action
~ Picture yourself heading to the library of life
~ Plan to sit a bit, no need to rush these things

2. Listen

~ Best way to learn and to open yourself to opportunities
~ Listening is like reading the titles and the first few pages of each new book
~ You know you are really listening when you are no longer thinking of yourself, but only the person or subject at hand

3. Reach-out

~ Best way to help and to receive help
~ Picture yourself opening a new chapter of your life
~ Don’t be afraid to become involved, trust your judgment, if you have followed the first two steps, you are ready

Am I always unfolding? No, not always, but when I do slow down long enough to follow this simple approach; I’m richly rewarded with new ideas, information, insights, and sometimes even new projects and friends.

I’m constantly learning new ways to slow down, to pay attention, and to reach-out at just the right moment. And, yes it is true, sometimes I reach-out and nothing happens or I get stung a bit. I’ve learned not to fret about those instances and to simply slide that “book” back into its place on the shelf and to continue browsing for others. I have seldom left a library empty-handed, and now I trust that the library of life will leave me with at least a good story or a rewarding lesson or two, and maybe, much, much more. So many experiences, so little time.

If you would like to try the art of unfolding: Show-up. Listen. Reach out. Repeat often, and then wait for life to unfold in front of you.

While you are waiting, you might want to open a good book.

Are you unfolding? We’d love to hear and learn from your experiences. And, if unfolding suggests a particular vision or image – tell us how it looks to you. “

Adapted from a Wishful Thinking Works post, Patrice Robson, March 7, 2011

I was recently driving the backroads of central Florida on my way to my son’s house and I was frustrated with something my husband did, or more precisely, didn’t do that morning. You know, one of those silly things that truly doesn’t matter but still bugs you. (And, honestly, I don’t even recall what it was now, but do remembering being frustrated!) I was also preoccupied with going over a mental list of everything I wanted to bring for my five day stay at my son’s.

A few minutes into the ride, I decide to get over myself and let my frustrations go, because I knew I soon would be passing some of my favorite scenery in rural west central Florida and I didn’t want to miss the joy it would bring me. I mentally apologized to my husband. (Please note, you can apologize for being frustrated or angry anytime, even when the person is nowhere around and even if they were “wrong” and not you!) And, next I decided it was too late to worry about anything left behind, which helped me let it all go.

With my thoughts and attention refocused, I began noticing the beauty around me. The miles of green pastures, the bends in the winding road and my favorite nursery featuring thousands of trees planted in precise rows that seemed to go on forever. The trees lined gently rolling hills which made the view deeper and more appealing to my eye.

My mood shifted immediately, and led me to notice simple things along the way that packed a surprising amount of joy. I saw houses with new roofs or additions being added and houses with brightly painted doors and window trim that accented the color of the home itself. With my free and refreshed mind, I easily imagined the joy of the families who lived in these homes, as they renovated and updated their houses. I imagined the pride they may have felt being able to make the improvements, and the happiness and relief they may have felt to get the job started or finished.

I noticed various yard and garage sale signs and thought about how happy those folks might be having cleared out their clutter and being able to make a few dollars selling the items they no longer needed. I pictured them in friendly conversation with the folks stopping by to browse or buy.

I quickly realized that my journey was filled with many opportunities to experience interest, delight, and even awe and that all of it was available to me for FREE by simply being open to what was going on around me with grateful eyes. (I felt a bit like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, realizing I always had the power, I just hadn’t seen it.)

My journey was an hour and thirty minutes, but seemed to go by much faster and filled my heart with so much joy, I truly felt as if it was overflowing. My feelings of happiness and serenity expanded when I realized I had done nothing more than notice what was around me and imagined the happiness and excitement others might be experiencing.

In life we spend a great deal of time imagining the worst, but are shy or reticent about imaging the best, or noticing the good. Don’t cheat yourself out of all of the joy life offers. In most situations, happiness is simply a few thoughts away if we simply let go and enjoy the ride.

(Disclaimer: This photo is not from my journey, the road was too narrow to stop to take a picture, but the view I saw is similar and etched in my mind and ready for replay at a moments notice. That is the way delight and joy work, they are always just a thought away.)