Lexi Bird Photography

One year ago, I couldn't swim.

Water has scared me for my entire life. I have what I would call a healthy respect for the ocean, in that it scares the hell out of me. I remember watching the waves from boulders in Acadia and being equal parts in awe and terrified. I was prescribed Xanax to fly across the ocean to Ireland in 2018. It's a fear that's lived with me as long as I can remember.

Maybe it's because I almost drowned once as a kid. I don't know. But somehow, despite this fear, I have found myself drawn to the water.

Underwater photography is something altogether different. It's only seconds at a time, but each time you go under, you enter a different world. A world we're not really made for, that we only get to visit. And to feel part of it for a moment is magical. It's intoxicating. I can't get enough of it.

So I learned to swim. And I've put myself in the water. And I've challenged myself along the way.

Last weekend was something I never could have seen myself doing before, but somehow I was belly down on the floor of a Florida spring, looking into a 20 foot pit as .wild.ethereal dove into it and emerged gracefully. Literally facing my fear and somehow popping back up for air and not having the panic attack I would have imagined.

Before I left to come home, I had already looked up where to get certified in freediving. Less than a week after coming home, I've made plans to work underwater as much as I can going forward.

I feel the walls closing in around me every day. And I just can't let them. So when it feels scary, I try to run towards it. I try to punch and kick and stretch the walls so that they can't tighten around me.

Because look what's on the other side of fear. I mean. Can you believe I spent my whole life afraid of water, only to take these photos? I hardly can, myself.

What is it you're afraid of?

What's on the other side of it?

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Endless thanks to of for leading this life-altering workshop. Thank you to .wild.ethereal and for being such incredible models. Thank you to and for keeping us safe all weekend.

I will never forget it.