Houston Puck Offs

Almost like that puck just wanted to find the net...Hey Heikki, can you explain?

The nicest goal you will ever see. (📹: @hockey_media_)

| Houston Puck Offs

Shhhh...you're going to want to see this. Game recap coming soon.

| Houston Puck Offs

We beat these guys Wednesday. Recap coming soon.

| Houston Puck Offs

Verse
Yo, last Wednesday night, the Puck Offs on the ice,
Took the desert by storm, played their rivals nice.
Seven to four, the scoreboard read,
Puck Offs ruled the game, left their foes in dread.

Alexei, Emils, Christian, Mihai,
Jesse, Vlady, Pavel, oh my,
They all scored, made the crowd roar,
Tommy in the net, kept the score hardcore.

Chorus
In the city of sin, where the stakes are high,
The Puck Offs came to play, aiming for the sky.
With "Johann's Bahn" still in their veins,
They battled on the ice, breaking all the chains.

Verse
Now, the night before, they celebrated hard,
"Johann's Bahn" beer, they pulled the card.
IV bags on the bench, between the shifts they'd dash,
Down the tunnel, reappearing in a flash.

The highlight reel, a moment so surreal,
Joonas with a deke, his fate he'd seal.
Overindulged, maybe, passed out on the ice,
Opened a gash, oh, it wasn’t very nice.

The goalie slipped in blood, an unfortunate slide,
As the puck crossed the line, with nowhere to hide.
A moment so bizarre, it was a sight to see,
The Puck Offs won the game, in a victory spree.

Chorus
In the city of sin, where the stakes are high,
The Puck Offs came to play, aiming for the sky.
With "Johann's Bahn" still in their veins,
They battled on the ice, breaking all the chains.

| Houston Puck Offs

Good afternoon Houston Puck Offs patrons. Welcome to another spicy game recap. This one is of last Monday's unfortunate loss to the West-Coast based black-n-white sea mammals. Though, more unfortunately, most of our PR team has been out sick with the flu and we had to give recap writing responsibilities to our 19-year old Instagram influencer / intern from California. See for yourself...

Oh my gosh, like, there was this game, so insane,
Houston got played, in like, total shame.
Only Magnus Dahl found the net, so lame,
Against those northerners, no need to name.

Fifty-one shots they took, no lie, no bluff,
Our boys managed eighteen, wasn’t enough.
A cannoli flew, oh so tough,
Their coach just ate it, acting all rough.

Tried to make them fight, but oh what a drag,
They wouldn’t bite, just made our spirits sag.
Eleven power plays, like a red flag,
Four goals they scored, made our hopes lag.

So like, even though we totally lost,
And our pride, oh, it came at such a cost,
That cannoli moment, it was almost boss,
Next time, we’ll win, no matter the frost!

-Houston Puck Offs #1 intern / copy writer