PolyAware

Ohh, ohh! This is one of our local polyam/ENM folks! Represent!

Episode 417 - Ashton Ashton grew up in a super conservative and religious home, didn't date in high school, and had her first kiss when she was 18... But that was then. Things are a bit different now! Ashton is now in her forties and has been practicing polyamory and non-monogamy for about 15 years. As she describes it,...

Hi, I would like to share this article with others who also identify as "open", "poly", or Ethical non-monogamous (ENM). When I joined the polyamorous community nearly a decade ago, one thing I noticed was that several members were either divorced or had left the group after their primary relationship ended, blaming polyamory as the culprit of creating conflict. I believe that opening communication and discussing boundaries may have led these individuals to evaluate their needs, resulting in the anchor (primary) relationship ending. When in fact, the exploration may have offered them the opportunity to grow.

I love the way they discuss life as a "choose your own adventure" in this article, as well as the retrospective analysis of what led to the changes in their relationships. Polyamory (also known as ethical non-monogamy) relies on the trust of those involved, communication, and, most of all, is an opportunity to reflect on your own happiness. I cannot speak for how polyamory has impacted other founding and active members of this group, but I can say that polyamory has helped bring out both the best and worst in myself and my relationships.

These "shifts" can be like the tide, sometimes calm and soothing, and others destructive. I'm not proud of how I hurt people due to fear and insecurities, especially challenges with mental health, and those whom I distanced myself from when my anchor relationship began to deteriorate. I have many fond memories of the time when Polyamory was new and exciting, and much heartbreak from the relationships that ended due to limitations of my growth and that of my partners, and in many circumstances, their partners (metamours) also. But in the end, I am grateful for the opportunity to explore freely, and that has been a cornerstone to creating a life with healthy attachment, love, and happiness.

"And my advice, in the end? The best way to feel secure, content, and create a life full of intimacy and joy is this: choose your own adventure, and don’t be afraid to let it change you along the way."

At 39, with two children, I opened up my marriage – I’ve found real happiness As a new study reveals that those in non-exclusive relationships are just as happy as monogamous couples - for some, this is old news