Private Practice Skills

I haven’t been posting these days because I’ve been in the midst of a move and living my best life in San Diego.

Also sometimes I have a love-hate relationship with Instagram. I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one right?

But I noticed that some new folks are following my account. Hello there! 👋 I’ll see if I might post a little more often - no promises 😅

If you’re ever wondering where I’m at, you can always find me on YouTube posting every week. Tomorrow I’ll be sharing about how I think efficiency is overrated. Click the link in my bio to find my YouTube channel!

In the meantime, I’m going to enjoy the gorgeous sunny day with my kiddos. Catch ya on the flippity flip!

No therapist is immune to offering bad therapy. Even “good therapists” make mistakes!

If you’re finding yourself making one of these errors, I strongly encourage you to seek consultation to dig a little deeper into what’s going on there.

If you’ve fallen into a pattern of repeating several of these mistakes, I encourage you to also consider what about your work or your life might be causing a break in the system. It may also be a good time to pursue personal therapy.

I know plenty of “good” therapists who have fallen into these patterns due to burnout, being overworked, or personal concerns bleeding into their work.

If you've seen a therapist who has mistreated you, you have the right to report them. I hear from clients over and over again about terrible therapy experiences they’ve had in the past. But very few folks actually make a report.

I understand what that’s like. I filed a complaint once after a therapist was wildly inappropriate with me across multiple therapy sessions despite me giving her repeated feedback. I finally built up the courage to report her, but it was terrifying. The main factor that made me motivated to file a complaint was knowing that she might be making these same errors with the other folks she worked with.

Not sure how to file a complaint? Each state has separate governing boards. Do a Google search with your therapist’s and state information, such as: “report unethical psychologist California” for more information on how to report your therapist.

Things got real in today’s YouTube interview.

I had the awesome privilege of interviewing Roy Kim, LMFT and Certified S*x Addiction Therapist of for today’s YouTube video.

The plan was to pick his brain about how he discovered his specialty so y’all could glean from his wisdom.

What I didn’t expect was his willingness to share so vulnerably about how he allowed his healing journey through one of his deepest pain points to shape his specialty as a s*x addiction therapist.

Roy went deep. Not only did he offer practical tips to help you discover your specialty, he did a fabulous job diffusing any shame you might have about being “damaged goods” and therefore I’ll-equipped to help your clients.

Spoiler alert: your deepest wounds might just be your greatest asset.

Check out his page for a slew of helpful resources for both new and seasoned therapists!

And thanks to Roy Kim for offering himself in such a helpful interview.

Watch the interview here: https://youtu.be/klbXEq4sIWs

*xaddictiontherapist

Not all days are a walk in the park, am I right?

I’m getting to that point in pregnancy where stuff is starting to get harder. My mind doesn’t think straight. My blood pressure has dropped pretty low. And the discomfort is starting to really kick in.

Also, my daughter is in the throes of her 18-month sleep regression. And she’s sick. I.e., I’ve had a perpetually screaming toddler in my care for the past couple of weeks.

This morning while my daughter protested nap in her crib, I was too lightheaded to pick her up and comfort her. So I grabbed a pillow and rested on the floor next to her while she cried.

For a moment, it seemed like a bad situation. But then I thought about how I have the freedom to literally throw out my work agenda for the week if I need to and just focus on tending to me and my daughter’s needs.

But I remember a time when that wasn’t an option. Bills needed to get paid. I needed to commute 150 miles in 2-3 hours of traffic per day to get my hours for licensure. I needed to stay up all night to work on my dissertation while completing a full-time internship.

Today, I have flexibility. But I didn’t always. And I know so many of you don’t have that flexibility right now.

So I just wanted to say, if you are pushing through right now, in survival mode, and doing what you gotta do to get stuff done and pay the bills even if you’re in desperate need of a break: I see you.

People of all professions are susceptible to this experience; it’s part of being human. But I think therapists especially have to put our “game face” on. Our clients can’t know how exhausted we are. We have to keep it together.

If that’s you: know you’re not the only one, and it also doesn’t always have to be this way forever (even if it does have to be this way for today). Take care of yourself as much as you are able, and be proud of yourself for making it to where you are right now.