Heartwork Counseling Center

I've seen this with people running long-distance races. Whenever they hear people in the crowd cheering them on, they rally and pick up the pace. This is also true for more day-to-day tasks.

When a student is studying for a big test it's nice to take a short break when a parent or friend checks in with them to see how it's going, and encouraging them with the words, "You're working hard, you’re doing a good job."

Just as other people can give you emotional support, you can encourage yourself.

As you work on your project, take a periodic break, pat yourself on the back, and remind yourself "You got this!" Your confidence can help!

When Jennifer takes her walk, she nods or smiles to anyone who makes eye-contact with her. Once someone asked her, "Why do you do this? You don't know me."

And she answered "We are both in the same community. I'm glad to show you some friendliness." and the person accepted this with a smile.

Human beings, and all mammals, have a need to be social. The small acknowledgements of other people help us get the socializing that we need to be emotionally healthy.

Making eye contact is a great way to do a brief bit of socializing. It opens us for an exchange with others.

We don't meet face-to-face as much as we used to. We don't spend as much time looking into each other's eyes when we talk with them.

The creators of cell phones understand the value of social interaction.

In their homes, they have a place to collect cell phones when family members come home. This allows for real family time, where people look at each other and talk to each other, strengthening family ties.

Being with friends without cell phones changes the experience from parallel play to greater social involvement.

This builds friendships and social skills and adds to the enjoyment of each other.

You will also have losses in your relationship with your body- slowing down, changes in balance, vision, hearing.

You may also have to deal with surgeries and getting used to new aches and pains in addition to the old ones.

These can help you age well:
- Regular exercise helps you stay active and handle the stresses in your life
- Get enough rest
- Eat well
- Visit your doctor for regular appointments
- Do what you love
- Stay connected to people you care about
- Fill your senses with things that smell good, are lovely to look at, feel good to the touch, sound good to your ear
- Learn something new
- Enjoy the moment!

Their grades may drop and they may withdraw, spending less time with parents and siblings.

As parents start dating after the divorce, they dash any hopes the children have that their parents will reconcile, and they feel hurt.

As you start to date, remember to consider your children and remind them that they won't be forgotten.

It will be helpful for you to wait until you’ve developed a stable relationship before introducing a new person to your children.

Young children may have concrete questions to answer.

Older children need to be reassured that their complicated feelings are understandable, and that, although they need to be respectful of this new person, they can develop feelings of caring in their own time.

Making physical contact with others through hugs, handshakes or a pat on the back reminds us that we are connected to others.

When we don't get enough physical touch, our bodies produce less Oxytocin, the hormone that triggers us to feel happy.

Elderly, ill or home-bound people may be isolated and in danger of being "Touch Deprived", also called "Touch Starved'.

Lack of touch stresses us out and may contribute to anxiety and depression.

Some things that help with Touch Deprivation are:
- Getting a pet will give you a living being to touch.
- Singing, dancing and telling jokes will raise your oxytocin levels, helping you feel better.
- Joining on-line classes
Chatting with friends online, seeing as well as hearing them.