The Branch Counseling PLLC

Girls, you can, in fact, choose the life you want to live. Sometimes it takes courage, connection and a lot of self respect but you can do it. Please know you will also survive that solo holiday just fine 😘.

Keeping the peace with self blame
This is a classic response I took on when responding to emotionally immature folx
Just want to give a shout out to all the daughters navigating mid life who learned to keep the peace by taking the blame and are now burnt the F out
When I first adapted this response I had little choice in my life and if you do this too I bet you might say the same. The difference is now in mid-life I have more choice and continuing to take the blame is just one of them (and it’s not wrong, it’s protective)
It’s not easy to face the emotional backlash of others but the truth is today I’m older, stronger, more capable of caring for myself, more understanding of my needs and just plan ol’ don’t have to put up with this crap
Learning to care for myself in the face of others unloving actions is the most powerful act I can take
Everyone isn’t mad at you but it makes total sense that it feels that way. And it can be different

So what’s self support?
Self support is the action of providing care to one’s self with no agenda
No: fixing, stopping, trying, changing
News flash you don’t need fixing or changing. You need connection (aka love but I know that hits hard for some, including myself but that’s for another day)
When I look back at my hardest times it’s not what happened that’s the worst it’s that I felt alone
I learned early on to ignore my feelings so when they tried to show up I labeled them as bad. The truth is they aren’t bad they are alone and they need support
You can offer support in Sooooo many ways but what matters most is that it’s not pushy or trying to control an outcome
Go on a walk to walk - not to calm down
Take a breath to breathe - not to control
Copeing skill to be with - not to get rid of
We need room and space to be human not restricted
Stay tuned ima start to share videos of how I self support with breath and movement