Sleepy Podcast

Three years sober baby 🤘🔥🤘

It’s been a massive year of change and I feel extremely lucky and humbled to ring in a third year of sobriety with a new community here in Brooklyn. People like Matt, Simon, and Brooke (pictured) consistently keep me going and call me on my bulls**t and make me want to live more thoroughly and honestly. I can confidently say that I’ve never existed more ferociously, intentionally, and indulgently than in this last year. All things I thought were totally impossible without being able to drink years ago. My life is god damn full and fun and silly and rewarding and weird and I have these people to thank for it.

I go to AA. A lot. Its a twelve step program and there’s some that would say it’s not cool for me to advertise that but I do because I think if I knew other people like me who got sober young, maybe I would’ve gotten sober earlier. Who knows maybe not. But I never saw myself as a classic drunk - being peeled off of bar counters at 7AM or stumbling around the streets with a paper bag (both of which I absolutely did and pretended I didn’t?!). I had a job, friends, a car (which I miraculously didn’t crash), relationships, hadn’t been locked up (always was faster than the cop chasing me 👟), and no one was telling me I might have a problem. Because I didn’t look like your store-brand drunk.

Picture 3 was taken during my last months of heavy, daily, destructive, belligerent drinking in quantities that are hard to wrap my head around. And hey! I didn’t look half bad. Maybe you disagree because of the shaved head or I’m just not easy on the eyes to you. Point is, there’s no box or poster child for what an alcoholic looks like. I thought I wasn’t one because I seemed fine and hadn’t lost everything to my addiction like other people I knew. But yeah. I wasn’t fine.

Not saying this as a “look out for your loved ones they could be hurting” kind of thing, even though you should - because an addict is going to use until they’re done in the end. But if you think you might have a problem and want help but don’t think you qualify - you might. And there’s help. And it’s fu***ng awesome.

Grateful and thankful 🤘🔥🤘