Mattheus - Mackydii

Photo dump 📸

behind all this I'm struggling with :

-working 2 jobs of teaching afterschool art and social media for the ecstatic dance community, neither pay enough,

-driving from Round Rock to South Austin daily,

- consistently performing below quality and my agreements,

- and Guilt, Shame, Anxiety, Shock, Confusion are the Disney's Inside Out emotions at the helm of the control center in me, and then in behavior I show up avoidant, insecure, stiff, afraid

-trying to keep up relationships, meet new people, when I know I'm not going to be able to text people back when just writing this text is taking to much ive my time and putting me in the red on my responsibilities. I'm afraid to look people in the eye because I know they'll want to connect with me. I'm a lovely person!
.. and it's all waiting on me to stop abandoning myself and my boundaries. Taking a step back for my mental health would be another hit to the Ecstatic dance community, and to prevent that, I stay trying to support the Center

Pray for me, I need strength and courage 🙏