Fake Georgia Tech

[Campus Bulletin] We're pleased to announce that all future commencement speakers will now be replaced by AI, as part of our ongoing commitment to making Georgia Tech tuition costs affordable to more students.

Next month's graduation class should get excited to learn from the wisdom and experience of our first robotic speaker.

[Campus Bulletin] We are hearing reports of a number of unruly dogs spotted around campus, displaying low intelligence and high aggression, likely due to irresponsible inbreeding. If you see such an animal, do not approach it, as it lacks the cognitive ability to communicate beyond the most primitive barking. Please contact your local animal control department.

[Campus Bulletin] Official sources tell us that precincts have not finished counting write-in votes, so George P. Burdell is not yet prepared to concede this election.