Reconnect-In by Celine Fontaine

I was discussing confidence with a client last week and was reflecting back on it today.

I realise that confidence is not a skill, something you have or don't have. Or even something you need to practice to get better at.

It's a subjective experience that can change from one moment to the next, from one hour, day or month to the next, depending on how I feel physically (tired, rested, hungry, sick, ...), mentally (overwhelmed, clear,...) and emotionally (sad, joyful, anxious, angry, still, numb,...) and more importantly how much I am turned towards others and who I am relating to.

Being surrounded by people that see me, hear me, understand me and can reflect back to me some appreciation (ie. Give me a sense of value) gives me confidence and makes me feel strong, safe to be who I want to be. It allows me to tame my fears and take action.

So what if instead of "building confidence" in ourselves by ourselves we focused more on building meaningful connection with people that make us feel good and powerful.

What do you think?

Bonus: How about offering more appreciation to those around you to help them feel confident ?
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There is a simple 3 step rule to give appreciation which I use with my kids and it comes from the work of Nancy Kline. She says appreciate a quality you see in someone, not what they think and say and use the 3S principles to do so :

✨be Specific
✨Be Sincere
✨Be Succinct (keep it short & crisp)

I always start off with “What I appreciate in you is...”

My two sons love ❤️ it when I offer them appreciation at bedtime and I am blown away but what they appreciate in me.

Happy week and don't forget to bring more meaningful connection into each day.

In this very moment I am conscious of how blessed I am to have quite a few spaces in my life where I find myself. ose myself. Often it is just with one other person, sometimes it's with my kids and sometimes it's with a few women in circles. And don't get me wrong, sometimes I still loose myself and feel alone and disconnected. I still remember a time in my life when I didn't believe I would ever belong and fit in. I wish someone had told me back then that it would come the day I started to be ME and stopped trying to look like everyone else, please everyone else and do / act in a way that wasn't me. The spaces you find yourself are the spaces where you can look crap, feel crap and say silly things or incoherent things and still feel acknowledged, accepted and loved.
Thank you to all the beautiful beings in my life that make me feel this way. You are everything I always longed for.

Launched # the first Women's Circle in Phuket. Feels amazing to start the year building up a small new community here.

"𝑾𝒆 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒔𝒆𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒉 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒖𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕'𝒔 𝒘𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒈 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒖𝒔" (𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘞𝘪𝘴𝘥𝘰𝘮 𝘰𝘧 𝘛𝘳𝘢𝘶𝘮𝘢 movie)

𝘈 FREE 𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 ! ! 🎞️ (only until June 14)

For the past years I have been learning about 𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓾𝓶𝓪 from some of the greatest thought leaders and experts out there Bethell, 𝐆𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐫 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐞, Resmaa Menakem, Thomas Hübl, Nicholas Janni, Peter A Levine, 𝐁𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐥 𝐕𝐚𝐧 𝐃𝐞𝐫 𝐊𝐨𝐥𝐤, 𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐩𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐖. 𝐏𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐬…. to name just a few.

I have been and continue to be be fascinated by what I have learnt and wish I had been taught this earlier in life.

Understanding 𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓾𝓶𝓪 means understanding that what happened to us, and might have impacted us deeply, stays in our bodies and our psyches, even though it might have moved out of our conscious awareness. Yet unhealed trauma is constantly re-enacted, drives our emotions, our reactions and our behaviours in everyday life and more often than not impacts (negatively 😠) our experiences and those we interact with.

𝐒𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐬𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐢𝐭 !!!

There is so much unhealed trauma at play in the workplace today. You would not believe the stories behind the people you work with and think you know. I keep on being surprised by how much people have been through in their life and are holding hidden inside, sometimes at a great cost.

𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝓉𝓇𝒶𝓊𝓂𝒶 𝒾𝓃𝒻𝓸𝓇𝓂𝓮𝒹 has been a game changer for me in my work with individuals and groups and has given me a whole new understanding of people. My compassion for others has been growing exponentially ever since. I am committed to keep learning about it.

𝐈 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐝 you watch the movie premiere of 𝘞𝘪𝘴𝘥𝘰𝘮 𝘰𝘧 𝘛𝘳𝘢𝘶𝘮𝘢 that has just been released. It narrated and based on the work of Gabor Mate and it is a brilliant introduction to trauma, how it plays out and how it can be healed.

Maybe 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐰𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐮𝐩 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐜.

Catch the free movie premiere here :
https://lnkd.in/ga45bJw