Naas Educators

How would you handle this as a parent?
Would you tell her please, thereby building in her an expectation of respect, even from elders?

Or would you dismiss her and force her to bring it, nurturing in her the idea that elders do not need to be respectful towards younger ones?

©Naas Educators

Firm parenting, not harsh parenting.



What's the key to raising obedient kids?"

IS YOUR CHILD ONE OF THOSE "BAD" KIDS TOO?

What is most beautiful is that when you spend quality time with your children (Again, not lectures. There should be lectures and serious talk time separate from fun time), you actually enjoy a more stable and happy life. That stress you claim is presenting you from having fun with them will actually reduce or vanish if you return home everyday and your kids are rushing to you, happy, smiling, and fighting to talk to you.

Most Of Us Are Neglectful Parents Without Knowing(2)

4. Disinterest or Detachment

When the parent responds to child with irritation or indifference, avoids deep/personal conversations or acts like the child is a burden, this is very often a sign of neglect.

5. Minimal Supervision And Guidance

When the parent doesn’t monitor where the child goes or who they’re with, leaves young children alone for long periods, and does not take an interest in guiding them whether with struggles or to become better, this is most often a sign of neglect.

For example, when a child struggles with memorization, and the parent never sits the child down to help with practical tips to memorize better or even attempt to understand what’s wrong, it’s often a sign of neglect.

Authoritarian parents who resort to beating whenever their kids have such struggles are in reality not just authoritarian, they are also neglectful. Such child will be prone to hiding their struggles rather than seeking help from their parent.

*7. Basic Needs Often Ignored*

When there is inconsistent or inadequate food, clothing, or hygiene or health problems go untreated, it is often a sign of neglect.

This might sound strange, but I have heard a teenage girl say one of the reasons she liked a male teacher was that he would ask about her illness even weeks after she recovers.

*Dangers Of Neglectful Parenting*

Children _need_ attention — and if they don’t get it from you, they’ll get it from somewhere else.

Sometimes, that "somewhere else" might be a kind teacher or relative.

But often, it’s from places, people, or habits that will harm them in the long run.

All it might take is a teacher asking, “How are you feeling today?” for the child to emotionally cling to them — simply because they don’t get that at home.

Neglected children are more likely to suffer from:
Low self-esteem
Depression or anxiety
Difficulty forming healthy relationships
Lack of confidence.

So, neglect isn’t just about refusing to feed or clothe your child.

It’s also about emotional coldness, disinterest, absence, and the failure to nurture, guide, or connect.

©Naas Educators

Most Of Us Are Neglectful Parents Without Knowing

After our last writing, many parents admitted to being authoritarian sometimes. Most felt they were authoritative, and a few even admitted to being permissive.

But in all of this, almost no parent saw themselves as neglectful — and that’s where the danger lies.

Neglectful parenting is actually practiced by many parents unknowingly.

Most parents — especially those with authoritarian or permissive tendencies — end up being neglectful in certain areas of their child’s life without realizing it.

So in today’s writing, we list some traits that often signals of neglectful parenting.

1. No Structure or Routines In The Family

When there is no structure or routines in the home, it is likely a sign of neglectful parenting. There’s no set time for family bonding, no fixed reading time, no predictable rhythm to the day. Everyone just does their own thing.

This does not have to be set in stone, so it is enough if you just have little islamic talks after Fajr or spend time together after isha talking and ‘gisting’ even if it is not written in a timetable.

It when nothing like this exists, there is a high possibility of the kids growing apart from the parents, and even from each other.

When there is a structure built for and around the kids, it sends them the message that they are important and their parents care about them.

2. Emotional Neglect
When the parent rarely shows affection or love, doesn’t notice or respond to child’s emotional needs, and fails to build a bond or connection with the child, this is very often a sign of neglectful parenting.

When a child is neglected emotionally, the child becomes vulnerable to outsiders who show the slightest sign of concern for them.

They also do not share that bond that makes them run to their parents to talk when they have struggles or difficulties, and this means they will run to others.

3. Lack of Involvement
When the parent is unaware of the child’s performance or interests, and does not know what the child thrives at or what he struggles with, it is most likely a sign of neglectful parenting.

I have seen a case where a parent was stunned when outsiders praised his kids for being so good at a particular thing. The parent never even had an inkling that his kids had any flair for that thing, and they had been doing it for over 3 years.

Part of the dangers of this is that the parent might have a wrong perception of their child. They may think of the child as “dull” because the child struggles in school, meanwhile, the child thrives brilliantly at something else.

When the parents shows continuous feeling that the child is dull, the child may eventually lose all their confidence and stop even that thing they thrive at and become a complete wreck. That’s how a lot of people who lack self-esteem are born.

To be continued tomorrow, inshaa'Allah.

©Naas Educators

A Framework For Responding To Children’s Accidents

If your child injures himself after you had warned him, how do you react? If your son injures his younger one while playing rough, how do you react?