Bethany Blaze

I have reached 500 followers! Thank you for your continued support. I could not have done it without each of you. 🙏🤗🎉

How About Tempering Your Expectations?

Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
But desire fulfilled is a tree of life.(Prov. 13:12).

Recently, I had this discussion with a lady and a guy.

Well, let me start with that of the guy because it happened first and was referenced in my discussion with the lady.

My guy who is happily married to his beautiful something ☺️☺️ told me this:

"Go into marriage with zero expectations. In this way, you won't be taken by surprise over what you see as times go by.

He went ahead to share his reasons and they are quite relatable and believable.

Come to think of it. If you had expectations so to speak and such expectations enter ghost mode nko? Shall we then end that evening mass and go back to our respective homes and console ourselves with imaginary benedictions?

I have mused over time and come to the understanding that this truth has so much depth to it.

Now comes the discussion with my lady friend. We highlighted the possible reasons couples get into conflict and and we both agree that people misapply concepts and ideas gotten from other marriages and it leads to unrealistic expectations. When expectations are hinged on idealistic mindsets rather that realistic manifestations, conflicts become inevitable.

"What man should do" and "what a woman should not do" is the basis for many of these issues. We create constructs and ordain victims of issues yet come back to bash the aggressors. What sort of innocent and normative hypocrisy is that?

Expectations aren't bad in themselves but we have to ask ourselves if they are our major motivations rather than the success of the union.

We have to check if they are realistic and realizeable. It is only a fool that will expect orange juice from cup of sand or words from the mouth of the dead.

Nothing exists where we think things are but many things reside in the place of plenty whether we think they are resident or not.

©2020 Bethany Blaze.