Wings

Buy her this to deserve her. Buy him this to prove how much you love him. Love yourself first. Be your own Valentine. Tons of misleading advices !

Are we meant to keep giving energy to commercial systems or to false spiritual trends - affected by colonization - stipulating how to show and to deserve love?

- Is this truly aligning with self-worthiness?
- No.
- Why?

Because we can’t love ourselves first if we grew up in dysfunctional families and schooling systems/societies where the true model of love was either absent, conditional or received through manipulation and this cannot be healed just by having someone telling us love yourself first !

We think we should do this or that, be like this or like that, match this or that chart, follow this or that rule to be worthy of love.

Is this love?
Is it self-love when we say I love my body now that I can do this headstand or now that I let go of that weight. I love myself now that I got this job title. I love my life now that I have this partner or that amount I aimed at in my account?

Aren’t we falling here in the same pattern of conditioning: “You deserve this toy, this outing or my love now that you ate all your plate, you got this grade, you won this medal etc…”

If we get to only love ourselves now that we are in the best phase, what if something changes? Do we stop loving ourselves? Do we shame/blame ourselves just because something unpleasant occurred? Do we activate the vicious love/hate cycle? Do we punish ourselves as they used to treat us for not being the best and good kid in all phases? And what about the previous phases? Are we meant to only love the sunny phases forgetting that behind every phase there is a divine wisdom?

No matter where you are right now, I gently invite you to reflect upon your self-worthiness and to softly and slowly choose to re-assemble it on strong pillars no matter how much time this will take.

There is no shame in having a hard past and harsh limiting beliefs. There is always a new opportunity to embrace oneself in all phases with compassion.

Wishing you a happy reunion and a gentle reconciliation with your younger-self.

You are always worthy of love!
Mireille

“I would like to spend the rest of my days in a place so silent - and working at a pace so slow - that I would be able to hear myself living.”

This wonderful quote from “the signature of all things” a book by Elizabeth Gilbert the author of “Eat, Love, Pray” came to my attraction last week and it brought tears to my eyes.

It brought tears to my eyes not because it is something new that amazed me. It is because this is the sentence I have been repeating to myself since 2013. It is what I have been promising myself to commit to since 12 years ago. I remember very well the day I said it out loudly. It was few hours before heading to Beirut from Qatar to undergo a surgery. I was having my coffee by the pool in the residence where I used to live. I was reading a magazine waiting for a friend to pick me up to the airport. Suddenly, I felt a goosebump, I looked at the sky, I felt a deep bliss, I saw everything so beautiful and I realized how much I was missing out a slow living where I can literally hear myself living. I had tears and after a deep sigh, I told myself this is what I am going to do when I recover from my surgery and when I return here.

Did I really do it?
I tried. I succeeded for few weeks then I was again taken by the busyness of life any by what my mind was used to due to the hundreds of programs and beliefs.

Until slowing down became truly my thing. Everything around me and within me was like pushing me to go there in order to align authentically with my body’s wisdom, my feminine energy, my soul choices and purposes, my values and with what I daily teach.

I slowed down a lot. Yet, I was not hearing myself living like I was truly wishing. There was many great moments of bliss I was grateful for. Just something deep was missing. It is only when the ceasefire happened in Lebanon ( still incomplete as you see ) and the liberation occurred in Syria that the sentence came back to me so strongly while I was facing a turmoil of emotions. Something in this liberation, liberated me from within. This is where I said this is it. This is how I am committing to live from now on. Because if it is not now then when?

And then by no coincidence this quote came to me as a gentle reminder that things can take time as it took me 12 years to make it fully come true just also it is not only about a choice. With this choice comes a deep de-programming from all the limiting beliefs not resonating with that choice and more often challenged by a resistance - and trust me our subconscious mind is great at it - where we can find ourselves dragged back into what we thought was normal for years and years: the myth of being a superwoman, a super mom, a super wife, a multi-tasker, strong, successful and independent, taken by the urge of proving oneself to society and to all the surroundings.

This is an ugly truth.
The beautiful truth is live and hear yourself living even when you go through hardships and challenges, even when you go through grief, choose not to rush it out as there is no deadline. Live and enjoy every step of whatsoever is the thing you are doing. Even when you are waiting,choose to wait consciously not with frustration. Trust the divine timing. Allow yourself to be truly present. Feel yourself present. Turn off the auto-pilot mode.

Choosing to live consciously without regrets and without I wish I did this or that is what will give richness to our existence. Believe me, this is so precious and so rewarding. It brings a great peace to the heart.
The whole world might tell you this is not doable nowadays. I do tell you, follow your heart and your inner voice, it is not the world that has to decide on your behalf. Isn’t it what the Divine Plan is showing us all around with all the systems falling apart and all the new light emerging?

The outer world is a mirror to our inside world. The change and the true liberation we wish to see and to live by is meant to be inside out.

Everything is interconnected.
Choose to reconnect to what truly matters.
You matter !

Do you know what happened when I reached the airport on that day? The airlines found out that they made a mistake and took reservations more than the available seats. I did not have a seat. To apologize, they offered me a first class midnight flight. At first, I was angry because I was supposed to reach Beirut at 8 pm and to surprise my dad on his birthday. Then I took a deep breath and said to myself there is time for everything and for now the Universe wants you to just sit, to offer yourself a cup of tea, to have patience, to enjoy reading your book and therefore to experience a midnight first class trip. Won’t you accept living and hear yourself living? Isn’t it what you have asked for?

The universe was hearing you and it did not want to wait until you recover and you return. It wanted you to start now. Then guess what was the book I was reading? The power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.

Magical right?

Choose to let go of the need to control.
God is having your back !
Choose to trust that.

Mireille.

Nothing has truly helped me navigating through the repercussions of the war in Lebanon, the wounds that emerged to the surface after Syria’s liberation, the harsh days the Palestinians are facing in Gaza and the apathy of people choosing to turn their eyes, except than choosing to cocoon, to stay home, to slowdown, to follow my own rhythm of grieving, to commit to a daily morning grounding in order to go through the turmoil of the emotions coming from all directions and to take it one by one without rush, without the need to over explain why I am feeling so to anyone, without expectations and of course without the urge of putting a deadline to my grief.

I chose to commit to all that faithfully because this is what I deserve and this is part of the nourishment my whole being needed in order to process, to release and to replenish.

What was happening and still happening around us is not a simple accident. We have been severely affected by it because we are human beings connected to each others and to all the cumul we hold within. No matter how much we choose to escape and to deny, it always returns to us in a way or another so we may choose to look at it gently and to hold a space for empathy by choosing to stand with justice.

We have been programmed that the best ways to cope with any pain is to distract ourselves because life has to go on. This has actually been a severe backfire. Our nervous system can tell.

It is about time to remember that no matter what is the individual and collective pain we are passing through, we have the absolute right to choose how to navigate through it without the need to prove anything to anyone and not even to ourselves.

If the world is choosing to go fast through a harsh and an inhumane system not designed to suit our brain, our nervous system and our whole well-being, let’s choose to remember that we are the ones who decide how we want things to be. It is part of our sovereignty.

It is self-care. It is self-love. It is part of our decolonization and liberation.
No matter what you are going through right now, choose to take your time to process it and make sure you remain gentle to yourself.

Blessed Be.
Mireille

Here we are, Few hours away from entering a new year and it is happening amidst a new moon up in the sky.

The sky that I am daily looking at - since the ceasefire in Lebanon - to empty my pain, to snuggle in its vastness, to feel cuddled by its magical clouds, to get inspired and to send to the light all what is no longer serving my highest good.

The sky, the sun, the clouds, the winter sunset, the moon in all her phases have been my healers during this whole month.

I stand up in the sun for 20 minutes every morning and I close my eyes allowing it to caress my skin and to go deeper into my 3rd eye opening new dimensions and healing my headache and giving me a boost for the day so I can navigate through all the emerging emotions.

I observe the clouds in all their shapes and color shades, I see in each one a message and a reflection.

I dedicate a long time for the sunset.
There is nothing more beautiful than the winter sunsets: the art and the artist in one scene. The sunset talks to my whole being. It took me a while to be able to stand there again and to see it without worrying about the sounds of the bombs falling in front of me and to accept the smoke is not there anymore but only beautiful clouds merged with the color of the sunset. For that I was in deep gratitude. Those moments were like a powerful prayer merged with deep tears.

Tears of old and current pains, of relief and gratitude, of compassion and empathy with all what is happening around us, tears of a year that was not like any other year.

A year that was meant to take us deep to that extent so we may understand in the up coming new year what was all this painful metamorphosis about. I chose to stop asking why. I chose to trust the divine plan behind it all, I feel for the pain of every person and for every living soul that had to go through one of the hardest pains caused by a brutal oppression and by an intentional genocide.

Today, I choose to close my eyes to allow this year to fade away with ease and gratitude and I choose to open them to a new year unfolding gently with so many answers and blessings in its wings.

Blessed New Year.
Mireille