The Real Project

Yesterday, I spoke at the Digital Justice & Online Harms in the Context of the Online Safety Act conference at

During my talk, I discussed my own experiences of image-based abuse and the need for the law around tech/image-based abuse to be taught in schools. We then looked specifically at the law surrounding harassment/stalking; image-based abuse offences; malicious communications and s*xtortion using statistics and case studies to illustrate both the gravity of the problem and the need for preventative education on it.

I don’t get nervous about speaking in front of different audiences but I do get worried that I won’t do the topics I am so passionate about justice when teaching them, especially when telling the stories of victims.

Yesterday, I spoke about Dinal De Alwis who was the victim of s*xtortion before ending his own life back in 2022. His story illustrates three incredibly important points:
1) ANYBODY can be the victim of s*xtortion
2) It can happen incredibly quickly
3) Children are not adequately educated to protect themselves and know where to turn if they do become a victim

I have spoken with Dinal’s father as well as The Met Police and have consent to share the forensic details of this case which highlight the dangers that ALL young people are at risk of which I will be doing next week.

The Online Safety Act is a tiny step in the right direction but combatting this issue takes more than just putting some legislation in place. This does not automatically fix the problem. Especially when said legislation is pretty mediocre at best.

*xtortion

Sometimes working within this field can feel like a real uphill struggle.

Yes, we have a seriously long way to go to make our Criminal Justice System one that is fit for purpose. But this does illustrate that changes are happening: legislation is being amended and laws are being altered.

What it also shows is our Government and the people who have the power to make these changes are not the right people. We are no longer shocked or surprised when Members of Parliament are arrested or being investigated for domestic or s*xual allegations or are publicly apologising for 'private jokes'.

I love the community on here of like-minded people with the same end goals: eradicate inequality, violence against women and girls and domestic abuse; raise awareness of our failing criminal justice system; and stand up for those that may not feel they have a voice.

Some accounts I have learnt lots from this year (check them out on Instagram) and love following are:
uk








Stay tuned for 2024 ✌🏼

*xualharassment #2023

TW - su***de

According to Refuge, domestic abuse costs the UK an estimated £23 billion a year.

So not only does this greatly impact society from a physical and emotional perspective, it also affects the UK economically too.

I have always been infuriated by the way every public sector deals has a reactive stance around most things. For example, when I was a teacher, I regularly worked alongside CAMHS (children's mental health services) as I taught quite a few children with deteriorating MH. I found that unless those children were actively trying to kill themselves, they were not deemed high enough to be given access to necessary resources. Instead, we had to wait for their MH to progressively worsen until they potentially harmed themselves and only then would there be resources available. Likewise in policing, so many 'low level' domestic offences are written off as just that - low level. As a result, the abuse often escalates and only when something more serious has happened will something be done about it.

Why do things have to reach rock bottom before we intervene?

Yes, preventative measures surrounding domestic abuse would involve infiltrating public sector systems with large cash injections but over the months, years and decades, it would not be such a financial, emotional and physical burden on society.

Busting one myth at a time!

Please don’t suffer in silence - it rarely gets better by ignoring it.

As well as support links for victims, our website also has loads of great educational platforms to help you learn more too.