Smug Slug Designs

When the apocalypse arrives and real food becomes scarce, you’ll regret not stocking up on Gruel.

Our manipulative marketing campaigns aim to redefine your perception of food and nutrition. If you’ve ever aspired to radiate health and beauty, then Gruel is for you. A recent study undertaken by one of our investors has unequivocally proven that 9 out of 10 people who abstain from Gruel are Ugly, Utterly Pathetic and Useless. We openly demonise the act of cooking, so we can free up your time to focus on your passions. If your passion is cooking, you’re f**king boring.

Conveniently, we overlook our role in financing all our peer-reviewed studies, ensuring they always align with our product’s health benefits - benefits that we pulled out of our arse. If that’s not enough we’ve chucked in some Vitamins and mixed it with some Science!

But wait, there’s more – receive a complimentary shaker and T-shirt to become an unpaid billboard for our groundbreaking product. Despite what cynics may claim, we’re not a cult; we’re simply fostering a community where we collectively acknowledge that consuming real food harms the environment. Hence, we proudly market our low carbon footprint and our holistic approach- holistic being a vague descriptor of our company values which enable us to smokescreen our true intentions.

Powdery gloopy Gruel; it’s the future.

Hope everyone is shining bright this weekend 💎

Diamonds was actually my morning affirmation song for a good 6 months, that’s why I’m such a fabulous Slug!

Didn’t have enough time to finish this, so it’s more of a diamonds in the rough.

Prompt was Sparkle ✨

I might have misheard the lyrics…🤷‍♂️

Prompt was shallow