Fangly

This is what I think has happened:

1. Israeli Prime Minister and erstwhile genocidal maniac Bibi Nutty-Yahoo has been salivating at the prospect of war with Iran for 40 years. Oh, btw - it just so happens that he was under investigation in Israel for corruption and needed a distraction.

2. According to former Secretary of State Anthony Blinken, PM Nutty-Yahoo tried persuading Presidents Obama and Biden to attack Iran but they both refused to do it.

3. The late Jeffrey Epstein, erstwhile pimp to billionaire PDFiles, was the best friend of President Sunkist (🍊) for 10 years. And Sunkist had a sweet tooth for young & pretty girls.

4. Unfortunately for Sunkist, it appears that Epstein was also a Mossad agent.

5. Sunkist campaigned on “No new wars!” And I think he was genuinely sincere. So why the 180 degree policy change with the attack on Iran at the behest of PM Nutty-Yahoo?

6. Hmm…Lemme think 🤔 Do you think Epstein had receipts of Sunkist with really young girls in compromising situations that he passed onto Nutty-Yahoo via the Mossad? And maybe Nutty-Yahoo threatened Sunkist with their release if he didn’t play ball on attacking Iran?

This is what I think will happen next:

1. People who are knowledgeable about military affairs are of the opinion that in order to win the war, the U.S. will have to send in ground troops.

2. The U.S. has no choice but to press on and win - they cannot pull back now because to do so would be humiliating and they’d lose their superpower status to China, which would move in as the new hegemon.

3. Because of Iran’s large population of 92 million and mountainous geography, a ground force of at least 2 MILLION soldiers will be required to win the war.

4. The United States doesn’t have 2 million soldiers. Therefore, it will have to restart the military draft. Probably in 2027. So if you’re an American between 17 to 24 years old and are reading this, you better start getting in shape for next year so you can serve a President who had dodged the Vietnam draft 5 times and calls veterans “suckers and losers”.

This entire situation is like a movie script from a black comedy…

This is my version of a song by a Canadian band called Crash Vegas. They were active in the early 1990s.