Outcome Inspired

The act of loving others as we love ourselves is the ultimate act of care. When we set up sacred boundaries for ourselves and our well-being, we create conditions that support our long-term engagement with those we love and hold space for. How have you established continued care practice through boundaries? What boundaries allow you to love yourself as well as others? 🌞

[BLOG]: Interview With Daniel Mate - Co-Author of The Myth of Normal Uncover all the answers in our blog!

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A Must Read. Read, Love and Learn
At 40, Franz Kafka (1883-1924), who never married and had no children, was walking through a park one day in Berlin when he met a girl who was crying because she had lost her favourite doll. She and Kafka searched for the doll unsuccessfully.

Kafka told her to meet him there the next day and they would come back to look for her.

The next day, when they had not yet found the doll, Kafka gave the girl a letter "written" by the doll saying "please don't cry. I took a trip to see the world. I will write to you about my adventures."

Thus began a story which continued until the end of Kafka's life.

During their meetings, Kafka read the letters of the doll carefully written with adventures and conversations that the girl found adorable.

Finally, Kafka brought back the doll (he bought one) that had returned to Berlin.

"It doesn't look like my doll at all," said the girl.

Kafka handed her another letter in which the doll wrote: "my travels have changed me." The little girl hugged the new doll and brought the doll with her to her happy home.

A year later Kafka died.

Many years later, the now-adult girl found a letter inside the doll. In the tiny letter signed by Kafka it was written:

"Everything you love will probably be lost, but in the end, love will return in another way."

Embrace change. It's inevitable for growth. Together we can shift pain into wonder and love, but it is up to us to consciously and intentionally create that connection.

As adults we can forget that children are people too. Just like us children don't like to feel manipulated and powerless. When children are starting to say "no" they are actually developmentally gaining independence and realising that they have some choices. This is a positive stage in development although is certainly doesn't feel like it at times. If we recognise that our children want some control we shouldn't react by taking more control away from them. This doesn't mean giving in to them, but for example, if they don't want to have a shower, give them a choice. Do they want to have a shower before dinner or after? For young children it might be choosing their plate even though they can't choose their dinner. They are still doing what you want but they feel that they have some control over their own life.

More information on my blog

https://www.thetherapistparent.com/post/cooperation-not-obedience-as-a-goal-of-parenting