Redirecting Children's Behavior Encinitas

Hey SD locals,
Free Parenting Workshop this Wednesday, May 25 from 9-10am at Magical Child in Encinitas. The topic is "Taming Tantrums". Come on come all!

Parenting Tip: Unconditional love.....this is such a hard one for so many of us. It means still seeing the love connection when your kids are fighting, screaming at you, causing mischief, talking back, ignoring you, hurting you or someone else, damaging something, having a tantrum, and the list goes on. Those are the times when it can be SO hard for us as parents. It's not that we "forget" or "stop" loving our kids--they are OUR KIDS for goodness sakes! It's that we allow the other emotions we are feeling to take the front row and push the love to the back. When we do that, it can take awhile for the love to come back to it's rightful spot--up front. It really is all inside us, and it's our choice as parents as to how this plays out.

I noticed this last night while I was waiting at the dinner table for my 4 boys to stop constant chatter, uncontrollable giggles, playing with their food, etc so that we could have a conversation together (keeping it real here). I could feel myself starting to push the love feeling to the back and start to get annoyed and feel disrespected. I could hear my husband's tone of voice change as the same thing started to happen in him. I'll be honest and tell you that I waited over 20 minutes....a lot can happen in your brain in that amount of time! I felt a lot of emotions move in and out. I also felt myself make a clear choice to keep the love up front. By doing so, I was able to (finally!) chat about our days with my kids without a condescending tone, without making them feel bad. I still let them know that I wasn't ok with how long that took and how I was feeling, but I chose to keep it kind and clear. What a difference in the end result. After dinner, one of my kids opened up to me about some things that had been going on for awhile. The love connection was there (a little corny, I know!).

Now, does this happen all the time for me--no. I am in the process of learning this as new challenges arise each day. Some days I am better at this than others. Some days, I let that disrespected feeling swirl, and it is a hard one for me to move through. I know though, that the more I have the forethought to choose to keep the love in front, the more successful I will be at this crazy parenting adventure. It's quite the learning process for me, as I'm sure it is for many of you. Hope this piece of advice helps some of you keep that love upfront today as you ride the parenting roller coaster!

Parenting Tip: We are the most ultimate models for our kids when they are young. As they grow, their friends/peers evolve into their models. If you have young kids, keep that at the forefront of your communication with your children. What you do and say sets the stage for who and what they will start becoming. No pressure, eh?

We all have a vision (albeit cloudy sometimes) of the well rounded successful adult we want to have raised and put out into the world. I like this quote because it reminds me of just that. Where I want to be "tomorrow" is standing proud of who my kids have become as they have grown--no matter what direction they have taken. I want to know that the groundwork I laid as a parent has prepared them as best as possible for their future in ALL ways. When I fail or succeed, they see that and it is my job to teach them (and myself) to grow from that.That is what they need from me, and that is what your kids need from you. To be the best parent you can be on a daily basis. And we are all different, so my best is not your best on any given day, but it is MY best. Be confident of that and you will imprint that confidence on your kids. Happy Friday, my friends!

Local San Diego Parents:
Upcoming RCB Kids Leadership classes and Summer Camp
Limited space. Register online now!

Redirecting Children's Behavior Encinitas
New classes for children ages 6-11!

April: Building Confidence
Dates: April 12, 19, & 26
Time: 3:30pm-5:00pm
Ages: 6-11 years old
Cost: $95/child
Location: Village Park Rec #2, corner of Willowspring Dr & Mountain Vista, Encinitas 92024
Topic: Children will discover their individual strengths and weaknesses and start to recognize the same in others. They will learn the connection between their words and body language with confidence, and will understand the importance of encouraging those around them. We use stories, art, games, and activities in each class and a healthy snack is included each day.

Kids Leadership Summer Camp: Self Esteem
Dates: July 11-15, Mon thru Fri
Time: 9:00am-12pm, optional lunch bunch 12-1pm daily
Ages: 6-11 years old
Cost: $195/child, lunch bunch $5/day
Location: 2110 Willowspring Pl, Encinitas, CA 92024
Topic: In this week long summer camp, kids will immerse themselves in self discovery. They will come away with a growing understanding of their capabilities and internal motivation. We will discuss being comfortable in your own skin, becoming independent thinkers, going above and beyond in different situations, and ways to communicate what you are feeling. We use stories, art, games, projects, and activities each day. Healthy snack included daily. Optional lunch bunch (BYO) from 12pm-1pm each day.

A great read and some good advice for those of you struggling with this.

How to Teach Frustration Tolerance to Kids Help kids develop coping strategies to manage frustration.