Counseling

The truth that many people never understand, until it is too late, is that the more you try to avoid suffering the more you suffer because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture you in proportion to your fear of being hurt.
- Thomas Merton

This was requested by the Dallas County Crime Victim's Council. They chose to use a more scripted one on their website but I felt this was a little more genuine.

Self-care when you've been the victim of a crime.

"What mental health needs now is more sunlight, more candor, and more unashamed conversation." // Glenn Close

How do you get the most out of therapy? Although not every therapist will know how to help you in the way you need, there are ways to improve your ability to access as much as you can from each therapist.

1. Be as honest and thorough as you can. I have a great deal of empathy and I can often sense when someone has experienced trauma, but if someone is unwilling to talk to me about it, it limits my ability to fully help. It can be difficult to share your deepest secrets with someone, but we are generally well-versed in the area of confidentiality.

2. Expect setbacks. Therapy, like economics, is not a linear concept. Most people do not improve without experiencing some, if not many setbacks. It pains me to know that some people will stop going to therapy because they idealized how the process should occur.

3. Expect to be uncomfortable. By nature, we try to find a safe place to be in our lives, but if that place no longer makes you happy, you will need to make changes. Therapy is about growth, and therefore uncomfortable, sometimes painful, and you will instinctively fight the changes in your life. Growth requires discomfort. Push past it, it can be the key to changing everything.

4. Expect to do most of the work. Your therapist is unable to "fix" you (or your child). They are there to guide you towards the changes you want in your life. My ultimate goal for all my clients is to teach them how NOT to need me anymore (unless a new trauma occurs). Ultimately you need to decide if you want your trauma to control you life anymore.

5. Do some research. Not all therapist are good at all things. Sometimes you are limited by insurance restraints, but make sure the therapist you choose has experience in the problem with which you are wanting help.

Write below if you can think of some more ways to get the most out of therapy.