Brandon Conn - standup comic/actor

If you are a coworker and you follow me inside the same bathroom, see that I am heading to a stall, and proceed to take the one beside me: You better either match my energy or be dropping nukes. There aren't "spectators" in warfare-- only fellow brothers at arms. You don't get to see my face and leave knowing I committed a war crime in there without mutual culpability.

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Bitch I'm here to stay like 💅💯 out here waiting for to chill and try and tell some jokes.