Osiris & Ra
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06/11/2026
The Cat With the Hands: Phase One
Osiris: The plan is progressing nicely.
Me: What plan?
Osiris: World domination, obviously. First, we convinced humans to feed us. Then we convinced them to clean our litter boxes. Now comes the final stage...
Me: And what's that?
Osiris: Human transportation.
Me: That's not a thing.
Osiris: Observe.
Leaps onto shoulders.
Osiris: Forward, steed. The zucchini require inspection.
Me: You're a cat.
Osiris: Incorrect. I am management.
Five minutes later...
Osiris: Slower. I must evaluate the squash.
Me: You haven't walked a single step yourself.
Osiris: Why would I? I have hands now.
Me: You do not have hands.
Osiris: Then explain why you're carrying me through the garden while I supervise.
Me: π
Osiris: Excellent. Next, we shall inspect the tomatoes. Then perhaps conquer a neighboring kingdom.
Me: You mean the backyard.
Osiris: The backyard... for now. πΌπ±π
The Pissy Face of the year award goes to.....
Ra!!!
Extra toes means extra clippings. He hates every second of it.
Just look at that face. πΎ
06/05/2026
He bags himself. πββοΈ
π« π« π« literally melting π« π« π«
06/02/2026
Osiris: "The wrinkles aren't ageβthey're accumulated disappointment due to the lack of upkeep out here."
Me: π
The convo taking place is hilarious!
Osiris gives zero fs as long as he gets his pattypats.
05/28/2026
Osiris: The humans don't want me here so here I shall be....
Me: π
Osiris: ππ
πΌ got em
Its a mess messin' with these two!
04/01/2026
Wake up!!
γviralγ·
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