Danielle Barone, LCSW

You weren’t born a people pleaser. You learned it.

For many children, approval becomes a form of emotional safety. When love, praise, attention, or peace in the family feels tied to meeting other people’s needs, children often learn to put themselves last.

Over time, being “the helper,” “the peacemaker,” or “the good one” becomes part of their identity.

People-pleasing is often not a personality trait, it’s an adaptation that once served a purpose.

Healing begins when you realize that your worth is not dependent on how comfortable you make everyone else.

You can be kind without abandoning yourself.

Avoidance is one of the most common symptoms of PTSD, but it doesn't always look like avoiding memories or reminders of trauma.

A diagnosis of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder impacts 5 main areas of functioning.
Trust
Safety
Intimacy
Self Esteem
Power/Control

These experiences can leave someone feeling helpless and powerless, as though they have little or no control over their own life. It's difficult to connect, open up, or talk about painful experiences when the people around you are invalidating dismissive, unresponsive, or simply don't understand what you're going through. When vulnerability doesn't feel safe, many people naturally return to avoidance as a form of protection.

The conversations and emotions we avoid often don't disappear; they tend to resurface later, often feeling bigger, heavier, and more difficult to navigate. Avoidance is not a sign of weakness, it's a survival strategy. Healing begins when safety and support make it possible to gradually face what no longer needs to be carried alone.