Jay 1

Dear men, we way don solve all dem problems ya at one time or the other, duya we get urgent meeting.

BREAKING:

Paul Kagame wins Rwanda presidential election with 99.1% of votes cast, the nation’s electoral body says.

Kagame has been in office since 2000 and this will be his fourth term.

To be clear, these are provisional results from Rwanda but President Kagame’s lead is unassailable.

The other 2 candidates collectively got 0.85% of votes cast.

41 THINGS TO TELL YOUR DAUGHTERS AS THEY GROW...✍🏾

1: Tell your daughter that Money has no gender. She can make money the way any Man can make it and even more.

2: Tell her to step into the FIELD not the BED to make money. Money from the field comes with dignity, money from the Bed comes with STD.

3: Let your daughter know that she need to trade her brain not her privates to make money.

4: Train your daughter never to pray to marry a rich man, but to work to become rich girl.

5: Train your daughter never to pray to marry a Governor but to work to become the President.

6: Train your daughter that the instrument of money making is under the Hat not under the skirt.

7: Train your Daughter never to Man-hunt but to focus her focus and she will become the focus of many Men.

8: Train your daughter that no man can love her like God, so she must never trade her relationship with God with a relationship with any Man.

9: Train your daughter that internet never forget or forgive, let her know that the foolish post she makes in the internet can depose her from her post tomorrow.

10: Tell your daughter that time wait for no man, if she waste her time with a foolish man, she will wake up one day to discover that it is night time.

11: Tell your daughter that life give back what you give into it, wickedness will be fully repaid.

12: Tell your daughter that beauty is not in exposing nakedness, it is dressing to look like a Queen.

13: Tell your daughter that she is a princess and not a pr******te, tell her to dress to prove she is.

14: Tell your daughter that it is a great wickedness to sleep with the husband of another Woman.

15: let her know that married men do not love her, they only see her as available s*x toy to satisfy the urge in them.

16: Let your daughter know that the best friend she can keep is God, He can not disappoint her.

17: let your daughter know that beauty without brain makes one look like a Decorated pig.

18: teach your daughter to believe in herself because she is capable of doing whatever she believes she can do.

19: Teach your daughter never to think that wealth is s*xually transmitted. Sleeping with wealthy men will only make her a w***e not wealthy.

20: tell your daughter good look does not make a man a good Man. He can have 6 PACKS and be a PACK of trouble.

21: teach your daughter never to be a Run girl because run girls normally RUN into trouble.

22: Tell your daughter knowing God is not negotiable and being righteous should be her entire Life principle.

23: Tell your daughter time go fast and wait for no one, she should stop thinking she has time to waste, she should get up now before it is too late.

24: Tell your daughter nobody wants to marry a liability, every man is looking for Help-meet not help-eat.

25: Tell your daughter she must have her own sources of income. A woman without her own sources of income will be embarrassed by her husband, in law and even her own Children.

26: Tell your daughter it is not all that glitters that are gold Some May even be a ball of fire.

27: Tell your daughter her body is not for sale but to preserve it for the man that deserve it after her wedding.

28: Tell your daughter failure is not the end but a bend.

29: Tell your daughter there is no height she can not attain, if she can just dare it.

30: Tell your daughter courtship is not marriage, she can still let go any man with red flags.

31: Tell your daughter that a broken courtship is not a divorce she can still get out of relationship at any time before wedding.

32: Tell your daughter she is beautiful, if a guy tells her she is, she will say my Dad told me too.

33: Tell your daughter never to be a runs girl, because this will ruin her future and destiny.

34: Tell your daughter that Marriage is more important than Wedding, she should take more time to prepare for marriage than wedding.

35: Tell your daughter Love is not enough for marriage, commitment, faithfulness, purity, contentment, communication, training etc are needed.

36: Tell your daughters that attitude is more than beauty.

38: Tell your daughter Labour bring favour

39: Tell your daughter she is not to submit to Men but her husband

40: Tell your daughter that marriage choice making may bring PAIN OR GAIN

41: Tell your daughter that it is not all Professors of love that are POSSESSORS OF LOVE, He may say I love you, he might actually mean I love s*x.

UNIVERSITY OF ADULTERY
FINAL YEAR EXAMS
COURSE: MARRIAGEMATICS

Time: 1 HOUR 30 MINS

INSTRUCTIONS

ATTEMPT ALL QUESTIONS

ALL QUESTIONS CARRY EQUAL MARKS

1. You are a married man and you have dated somebody's wife for two years, busy spending on her like there is no tomorrow. Eventually she drops you and concentrates on her innocent husband. Calculate the percentage of time wasted. (20 marks)

2. You bought a phone for your friend's wife and she gave it to her husband. Using trigonometric identities, derive a general formula for this type of love. (20 marks)

3. For Men You're dating around 15 ladies and every lady is demanding for a Samsung Galaxy and an iPhone x

(a) Plot a graph of detoothers against prices of phones.
(15 marks)

(b) Use your graph to estimate your future poverty (5 marks)

(c) Plot the percentage shame against volume of apologies to your family members. (5 Marks)

4. You are whatsapping and facebooking other people's wives yet you don't want to see your wife on the social network. Calculate the Percentage Error in your thinking capacity. (20 marks)

5. You are a civil servant, your wife is a petty trader, your combined household income is less than 10, 000k Your daughter is using iPhone 6s and Samsung Galaxy worth 30, 000k each. Calculate the percentage of your Parental Negligence. (20 marks)

6. For ladies You're a married woman and you have dated 20 guys with hard labour, use the law of diminishing returns to calculate the substance that will be left for your husband to enjoy. (20 marks)

7. You can't give your wife 2000k for a pot of soup, but you spend over 5000k in bars and restaurant.
Calculate the radius of your 'stupidity', take π=3.142 (20 marks)

8. You have been in the church and in your fellowship for years but your name is not in the book of LIFE because of the secret sin. Calculate the years you will spend in HELL? (30 marks)