Coping With Divorce

WHEN YOUR MARRIAGE FEELS DEAD
When people get married, they often buy into several common misconceptions about marriage. Many
of us have been made to believe that getting married is supposed to always have a "…and they lived
happily ever after" narrative. When that doesn't happen, we blame it on our choices, also known as
spouses, and seldom accept that a marriage is built by two people and not bought off a supermarket
shelf.
There is nothing wrong with expecting to live happily ever after, but… if only this were true, if we do
not put in the effort! Just like cars, marriages have "warning lights", and we need to recognize them
before things go all wrong. Several common warning signs tell that a marriage is in trouble. The truth
is successful marriages take a lot of hard work. Both parties in the relationship must take the decision
to identify issues and unacceptable behaviour before they become serious problems. It isn't the duty
of one or the other. Neither is it healthy to stay in an unhappy marriage using the children as a prop.
A lot of the chaos in marriage is because issues have not been attended to before they become worse.
It is possible to have many years of occasional happiness but not be truly happy in a marriage. There
are times when some good news knit a couple closer and many more when they cannot stand the
sight of each other. It is never too late to truly create a marriage that will make one happy. No two
persons are totally compatible, but a sincere effort at making your marriage work will strengthen it.
As Leo Tolstoy says what counts is how you deal with incompatibility and not the fact of being
incompatible.

From Saturday 20th April and twice every week I shall be sharing insights from my e-book titled When your marriage feels dead. Have you downloaded the e-book yet?

Want to learn coping strategies for when your marriage is suffering? Join the group on Facebook

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