Gozi Halima

One of the biggest lies we tell ourselves is that we want change.

Sometimes we do.

But sometimes what we really want is relief.

Relief from the uncertainty.

Relief from the disappointment.

Relief from the discomfort of where we are.

Real change asks something of us.

It asks us to grieve what didn't work.

To let go of identities we've outgrown.

To have conversations we'd rather avoid.

To take responsibility for choices we didn't want to make.

None of that is particularly glamorous.

But it's often where the real work begins.

Change isn't hard because we don't know what to do.

It's hard because of what we have to let go of in order to do it.

I think we've been told the wrong story about reinvention.

We tend to imagine it begins with inspiration.

A breakthrough.

A vision board.

A moment of clarity where everything suddenly makes sense.

But when I look back at the biggest changes in my life, that's not what happened.

Most of them began with disappointment.

A moment when something wasn't working anymore.

A relationship.

A job.

A dream.

A version of myself.

And before anything could change, there was a reckoning.

The uncomfortable realisation that the person who got me here couldn't take me where I wanted to go next.

Not because she was wrong.

Not because she failed.

But because she'd taken me as far as she could.

I think that's the part of reinvention we don't talk about enough.

The honesty.

The grief.

The letting go.

The willingness to admit that something needs to change.

What if disappointment isn't the end of the story?

What if it's the beginning of a new one?

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