2 WHYZ

(Edit: it’s kind of a long read. My bad.)

Well it’s been a 8 years without any updates so if you’re still here, thanks for supporting. If I’m being completely honest with you guys, as honest as I am with myself, the reason I haven’t been making my music available is I didn’t feel like the best version of myself. As selfish as that sounds. I was trying to figure out what to do in life and I wasn’t even sure it was music at that time. My first run in 2012 - 2016 was covered in stress, homelessness, jail stints, su***de attempts and addictions & I just didn’t care to come back to the studio to make new music. I was too busy trying to find new ways to die and then new ways to survive in a weird hypocritical cycle. In 2015, my home studio got destroyed. I also got evicted the same month. I felt defeated, i lost my inspiration and drive and then I said f**k it… I realized I wasn’t making any music and drinking seemed to ease my pain. That went on for 3 years. I got stabbed to death in 2019 and that scared me sober. I’ve drank since then but I haven’t been drunk in years. The last few years have been the only time in my life where I didn’t feel like I was fighting or running from something and it’s going amazing. I’m now a father. I’m sober. I have my own place and then somehow I learned to love life. I’m not sure how to make music when it’s not coming from a dark place, but I’m learning how. I think being stolen from artistically really took an effect on my mind and pushed me into a place where I felt like artistic isolation was best. But that’s not true. I shine bright. I trusted my peers and the more that I looked around, the more that I saw that we were directly inspired by the same experiences in life, or they’ve been inspired to act and dress and speak in a way that I do and that’s not who they are. That’s who I am. I shine bright. it hurt to see those people blow up in ways that I could only dream of while using my template as stepping stones to success, but if you work hard enough you deserve your success and these people worked harder than I did. I guess what I’m trying to say is at the end of it all, I still have hope. I still write music and I still want to pursue this as a dream. My talent is still sharp. I understand that I’m older now but I have so much more to write about. Who knows, maybe I’ll even put out a song this week just to pop out and show natives. 🤷🏽‍♂️